Triple Toe Loop of Passion

This Valentine’s Day I want to talk about love. Russian love. The kind that glides and twizzles and poses.  I want to talk about the most mysterious, fringed couple I’ve observed in pop culture in a long, long time: Tatiana Volosozhar and Maxim Trankov.

volsozhar_trankov2_psga6iw5_qrld5w6mWhat are you LOOKING at, Maxim, you graceful devil?

I haven’t caught much Olympic coverage this time around, but last night I was able to catch up on the pairs figure skating finals and NBC did a profile of these two snow bunnies. Before you go to IMDB, Tatiana did not star on The Office as Angela Martin, and incredibly, they aren’t even related.

Here are just a few things I learned between viewing the profile, and doing a little background research:

– She is from Kiev

-He moved to St. Petersburg at 15 and lived in an ice rink because he didn’t have anywhere else to go

-They have a dog together

-He categorizes their relationship as “romantic” AND “platonic”

-They spend all their free time together

And, come on.

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There’s something fascinating about the whole pairs figure skating dynamic. There’s so much intimacy and sensuality involved in a lot of the routines, but it’s not like they’re all couples! Some are probably gay. Also, I mean, these guys are brother and sister:

Chris+Reed+ISU+Grand+Prix+Figure+Skating+2013+ajLrRyXpgUulThe Reeds from Japan. Brother and sister. Come on, mom, what were you trying to do here?

I enjoyed watching the Russians’ routine, as nightmarish as it was (Jesus Christ Superstar soundtrack and their final pose was, yup, a cross). They have a beautiful, exciting-weird chemistry. You guys, they bought a dog and they are having sex with each other through intense gazes constantly.

Remember how he used to be a homeless 15 year old with ice skates? Now he has a gold medal, a funky ponytail thing, and his best girl to throw in the air.

Oh love, oh costuming choices, oh twizzles!

Happy Valentine’s Day.